May 15, 2009

Just need to vent

I am having a blah day today. I have been so stressed. We are on the last month before we hear on Darin's work comp hearing. I have been doing a lot of praying that God's will can be done and understood right now because I don't know what is going to happen or how we have been able to get throught the past 6 months.

We have been fortunate enough to date to have been taken care of. With help of course from multiple places but most of all faith. I feel for the most part that I have worried the past 6 months, but not stressed about how we were going to get through it, I have just known that we would. I have been pretty calm considering the circumstances. I am starting to feel the back pressure of it all now though. The closer it comes to June the more I worry about how the bills are going to be paid, how we are going to afford to live, all the things that I have known would be taken care of and had on overwhelming calming feeling about, feels like the exact opposite now.

I am sick from thinking about it, my stomach churns and I can't seem to get it off my mind. I fret about these things now daily. I know that we will be okay and I keep reminding myself that. I know that whatever happens, if workmans comp is denied or approved, that we WILL be alright. Some bills may get backed up a little more but we will get caught up again.

I have been praying for relief from this "black hole" feeling, but it seems to get more overwhelming every time.

I keep telling myself that this too will pass. Come what may and love it. If God led you to it, he will lead you through it. There is a reason we are experiencing this in our lives right now and I need to look at the bigger picture and learn from this.

I guess I just haven't convinced myself quite yet.

I really am so thankful for everything that I have. I know that we are so blessed to be where we are today. We truly are so fortunate.

I guess I will just stay on my knees becuase this too shall pass!

1 comment:

  1. somehow i missed this post on my google reader and had no idea you were feeling blah. All I can say is Amen, sister! It does get better eventually, I think :) We love you guys and know everything will straighten itself out soon. You are in our thoughts and prayers.